Comentario Aleatorio

Ah, as pedras cotidianas! Sempre nos impedindo e bloqueando! Quisera eu ter tanto poder para retira-las dos caminhos de todos. Sendo apenas um individuo, mal consigo lutar contra as que aparecem na minha frente. Talvez se juntassemos nossos braços poderiamos aplicar uma força maior a essas intemperies que nos deixam incapazes de continuar progredindo, sempre com a grande esperança de que no dia seguinte nao existam corpos tao pesados para serem movidos.

Esse foi o meu comentario relacionado ao texto das pedras de Drummond que apareceu no facebook do Senado. Fiquei orgulhoso entao mandei para um colega no Transformice.

> [100] [Doctor11th] bom dia
> [100] [Doctor11th] ta de boa ?
< [Doctor11th] oh ye
Você não está autorizado a falar neste servidor.
> [100] [Doctor11th] e a vida ?
< [Doctor11th] Ah, as pedras cotidianas! Sempre nos impedindo e bloqueando! Quisera eu ter tanto poder para retira-las dos caminhos de todos. Sendo apenas um individuo, mal consigo lutar contra as que aparecem na minha frente. Talvez se juntassemos nossos braços poderia
< [Doctor11th] poderiamos aplicar uma força maior a essas intemperies que nos deixam incapazes de continuar progredindo, sempre com a grande esperança de que no dia seguinte nao existam corpos tao pesados para serem movidos.
< [Doctor11th] acabei de digitar
Fpsgirls acabou de se conectar.
> [100] [Doctor11th] vou ver se vc pegou do google perai
> [100] [Doctor11th] é serio ?
> [100] [Doctor11th] vou salvar
> [100] [Doctor11th] achei interessante
> [100] [Doctor11th] se eu disser isso em algum seminario
> [100] [Doctor11th] vai ser massa
> [100] [Doctor11th] vc nunca disse
> [100] [Doctor11th] saber escrever
> [100] [Doctor11th] caramba animol
> [100] [Doctor11th] eu to realmente supreso
> [100] [Doctor11th] surpreso '
> [100] [Doctor11th] ainda to duvidando se foi você mesmo q escreveu ksks

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Agora eu retiraria o ultimo "para" e colocaria "a". Mas jah foi.

Aderbal e seu Carro(Ficticio)

Aderbal queria comprar um carro. Ele nao tinha conhecimento sobre a cidade aonde morava, mesmo que nao passasse dos duzentos e vinte mil habitantes. Esse moço decidiu que compraria uma bela protese peniana alem de tambem funcionar como protese substitutiva das pernas.

Foi pesquisar para encontrar um bom preço. Descobriu que um carro que passava em seus testes de apreciaçao visual custaria em torno de vinte meses de salario pagos integralmente a concessionaria de veiculos. Aderbal ouvia historias de pessoas que compravam a aprovaçao em concursos promovidos pelo governo por meros dois meses de serviço. Como nao possuia emprego o jovem resolveu que primeiramente descobriria uma forma de conseguir dinheiro para atingir o seu maior objetivo.

Aderbal via todos os dias os seus vizinhos venderem drogas. Logo pensou em entrar neste belo mercado que tambem eh extremamente perigoso. O rapaz nao tinha tempo. Suas aspiraçoes afetivas impulsionadas pelos hormonios da juventude o deixavam cego em frente a tantos possiveis problemas. Tambem ouvira de um colega que veiculos motorizados nao eram necessarios e que para se ter corpo e mente saudaveis a falta de rodas se fazia ateh necessaria. Claro que um pensamento tao diferente do comum foi imediatamente repelido.

Comprou alguns gramas de entorpecente. Conseguiu revende-los e triplicar o seu capital em menos de um dia. O homem que se formava nao parecia um valor adicional a sociedade. Em poucos dias Aderbal jah pensava em comprar uma pistola pois a competiçao eh sempre feroz quando nao existem regras. Um dia cometeu o seu primeiro homicidio. Uma divida nao havia sido paga. O traficante agora tambem era um assassino, mas nao se importava porque era apenas parte do seu trabalho. Conhecer um pouco mais do mundo e das garotas sobre rodas era o que queria.

No crime poucos vivem para ver os seus filhos passarem da adolescencia. Aderbal nao foi um deles. Sem a sorte de obter a homogenia da area em que atuava ele foi recompensado como a maioria dos marginais que sao identificados como a parte mais fragil de um sistema. Nao obteve um veiculo, mas uma viagem sem volta para o outro mundo, que eh o que se ganha quando atravessamos a linha de respeito pertencente a alguem que pode matar para que outros nao façam o mesmo.

Random

A/ab/abc//Letrinhas//Coisinhas bonitinhas.//Desenhar sons.//Falar os sons de volta.//Ideias.//Como diria o Bilu, conhecimento.

Nunca conseguia o numero de linhas necessario para terminar uma redaçao.
Entao sempre fazia a historia completa, de uns tres paragrafos com inicio, meio e fim. Depois começava a encher com o maximo de palavras possivel sem adicionar nenhuma informaçao nova. Nao gostava de fazer aquilo mas era necessario. Gosto de coisas simples e diretas.

E quanto mais rapidos ficavam os computadores e a comunicaçao entre eles mais passei a tentar economizar o tempo das outras pessoas alem do meu proprio. Entao sempre tentei passar a informaçao da maneira mais clara e breve possivel. Acho que melhorei bastante com o tempo mas ainda nao considero a minha habilidade de sintetizar informaçoes aceitavel.

Entao agora vou tentar o contrario. Me prolongar o maximo possivel e fazer com que a atençao e tempo perdidos pelos dois, ouvinte e falante, sejam tao grandes que ao fim do meu discurso o receptor da ideia fique com vontade de me dar um soco caso ainda esteja no local admirando a minha total falta de senso comum com o claro intuito de fazer com que absolutamente nada seja adicionado e mesmo assim pareça que algo realmente estah acontecendo.

Paciencia

Por algum motivo soh tive alguma açao ou opiniao sobre algo quando jah estava disposto a enfrentar todas as consequencias possiveis. Nao dah pra calcular todas as possibilidades mas depois de um ponto especifico voce jah consegue decidir se vai ou nao fazer algo.

Lembro quando nenhum dos meus dois irmaos queria ir ateh a locadora de jogos comigo, quando eu tinha por volta de dez anos, jah que eu demorava para escolher um cartucho. Precisava de uns vinte minutos, mas como a paciencia deles nunca foi grande, em tres jah demonstravam todo o nervosismo que era possivel expor em publico direcionado a um irmao mais novo. Hoje no mesmo local funciona uma loja de produtos de beleza.

Sempre tive muito orgulho da minha paciencia. Ficava horas no carro do meu pai esperando por ele e o que mais me fazia falta era um relogio para poder calcular quanto tempo estava passando. Na sala de aula o professor de matematica da quarta serie me chamava de Licio Robo. Eu sabia que nao podia me mexer para nenhum dos dois lados quando o professor estava na frente da classe. Tudo o que fazia era permanecer imovel e com toda a minha atençao direcionada a cada palavra que saia do instrutor. Sempre tive muito medo de nao passar de ano e agora percebo que repetir algum deles nao teria alterado a minha vida. O pior ponto seria nao poder ficar na mesma serie dos meus antigos colegas. Ver as mesmas faces repetidas vezes, diariamente, me dava uma sensaçao de segurança. Um colegio militar cria uma amizade mais forte entre os alunos. O mais legal de toda essa atençao eh que eu nunca precisava ler uma palavra de nenhum livro depois das aulas. Os exercicios mandados para fazer em casa tambem se tornavam extremamente faceis.

Tambem conseguia esperar por varias horas fora do colegio quando esqueciam de me buscar. Resolveram me fazer andar no onibus escolar. Fui passageiro poucas vezes, ateh passar mais umas horas pensando no que fazer depois de perder o onibus. Resolvi começar a andar seguindo uma rodovia e um militar acabou me dando uma carona. Começaram a pagar uma van para me transportar e em pouco tempo eu jah me sentia tao impotente que passei a acordar duas horas mais cedo para ir a peh para o colegio. Mesmo que fosse muito cedo eu me sentia muito bem andando nas noites frias da cidade. Estava me sentindo como um individuo. Um cidadao livre. Um ser humano de verdade e nao mais um zumbi que era obrigado a fazer tudo o que lhe era mandado. E nao fazer nada quando nao existiam ordens.

Entao ganhei uma bicicleta e pude pedalar para a escola. A economia de tempo e adrenalina eram grandes mas acabei sentindo falta dos momentos que tinha para pensar fora de casa. Depois do ultimo ano do colegio resolvi que iria ficar em casa. Tinha certeza de que nao encontraria o que estava procurando fora do meu quarto. Entao depois de passar no primeiro vestibular para conseguir o diploma do ensino medio fui inscrito em mais uns tres e resolvi nao fazer as provas. Consegui fazer a pensao alimenticia ser transferida para mim e com muito dinheiro consegui comprar um caminho fora da grande tortura que era viver. Sentia essa grande dor psicologica desde os dez anos quando meus pais se separaram.

Felizmente quando me aproximava dos trinta consegui fazer o meu manual de sobrevivencia extra-corporea. Dois anos depois a minha religiao. Pode parecer brincadeira mas essas duas coisas me deram um suporte tao solido que a vida passou a valer a pena.

Sempre serah possivel perder a paciencia, mas todas as formas criadas para conseguir uma concentraçao a trazem de volta sem muita dificuldade. A guitarra eletrica, as musicas e os jogos sempre me ajudaram muito. Os livros tambem, em menor intensidade. Tambem beber muita agua e comer muito alho alem de dormir sempre o maximo possivel.

Viagem a Florianopolis

Me falaram que rolava de eu me encontrar com eles lah em Florianopolis.

Nao me falaram quando foram comprar a passagem de onibus. Estava claro que eles nao me queriam. Mas eu realmente ainda imaginava que poderiam ser meus amigos. Eu era muito inocente.


Falei ateh para um amigo sobre a viagem. Ateh o convidei para ir com a gente. Ele falou algo sobre conseguir uma passagem de aviao com outro amigo mas acabou nao indo.

Dei uma olhada pela internet nos onibus. Encontrei um que iria antes do onibus deles. Comprei uma passagem. Dormi a maior parte da viagem. Proximo ao meu lugar tinham umas tres garotas bem bonitas. Uma vez ateh conversamos sobre andarmos juntos, os dois grupos, pela cidade. Peguei o telefone de uma delas. Nao foi usado.


Cheguei em Florianopolis. Estava tudo escuro. O local aonde o onibus parou era bem iluminado. Fui ateh um local aonde poderia comer alguma coisa. Perguntei o que tinha. Depois perguntei o que ele recomendava. Aceitei a recomendaçao. Perguntei se teria algum lugar para guardar as minhas coisas. Ele apontou para outro rapaz que cuidava do guarda-volumes. Fiz a minha refeiçao, um sanduiche com ovo, e fui deixar os meus pertences em um local seguro por um preço camarada.


Perguntei ao carinha aonde poderia encontrar um taxi. Ele apontou para aonde estavam os taxistas. Fui ateh lah e perguntei aonde poderia encontrar uma moça que me deixaria feliz por algum dinheiro. Um deles se ofereceu para me levar. Deu varias voltas mas acabou chegando ao local. Pedi para me esperar. Combinamos o preço da espera. Logo depois de entrar encontrei uma bela garota. Ela me informou que eu teria que paga-la uma bebida para que pudessemos conversar. Aceitei pagar. Ela me disse como aconteciam as coisas por ali. Acho que por uns cem reais eu poderia leva-la ateh um quarto. Na epoca esse dinheiro valia quatro vezes mais. Nao havia trazido tanto. Falei para a menina que nao tinha o suficiente e se poderiamos apenas conversar. Ela concordou ateh que falou para eu dançar e eu nao quis.


Antes de ir embora ficamos sentados proximos a uma mesa. A mao dela foi ateh a minha coxa. Me senti muito bem com aquilo. Que gentil, deixei claro que nao pagaria pelo sexo e ainda transfere um pouco do calor de sua mao para a minha perna! Ela falou como sobre perdera a sua virgindade. Tinha sido com o professor de informatica. Foi uma historia interessante mas nao pude lembrar dela. Aquela mao na minha coxa jah tinha feito toda a minha viagem ter valido a pena.


Entao voltei para o taxi. O moço me levou ateh a estaçao de onibus. Ainda tinha muito tempo para matar. Resolvi ir ateh o posto de gasolina. Lah encontrei um guia turistico. Um bom rapaz. Ele falou sobre o Tribunal de Contas da Uniao depois que eu revelei que era de Brasilia. Tambem me perguntou se eu nao gostaria de cheirar um poh. Respondi que nunca havia experimentado mas que gostaria. Fomos caminhar pela cidade. Depois de sacar dez reais fomos ateh uma casa em cima de um morro. Lah ele chamou pelo Alambique, que nao respondeu. Resolvemos andar mais um pouco. Fomos ateh um predio aonde a tia dele morava. Falou que poderiamos dormir lah mas acabamos decidindo por ficar acordados. Fomos ateh um supermercado. Lah compramos uma coca e ateh demos um pouco para uma moça. Depois o cara me falou que era possivel que a moça ficasse mais intima com a gente. Por algum infortunio nao aconteceu.


O sol jah nascia. Fomos ateh outra estaçao de onibus. Parecia bem nova. Perto dessa estaçao existia um escritorio de Turismo da propria cidade. Fomos ateh lah pegar algumas informaçoes. Me disse que o mercado de ostras seria um otimo investimento. Mas eu falei que nao tinha dinheiro pra tanto.


Saimos do escritorio. Sentamos na praça. Conversamos sobre coisas que jah nao me lembro mais. Ele falou que iria trabalhar de guia turistico em um barco em breve. Me acompanhou ateh a estaçao estadual de onibus e foi embora. Fiquei sentado em uma cadeira de plastico ouvindo radio. Os amigos chegavam.



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Foi um momento caloroso. Zeley Mobilio sempre fora bem vocal, principalmente em reencontros. Fomos para uma outra estaçao de onibus, aquela que ficava perto do escritorio turistico da cidade. Tiramos uma bela foto. Acho que tinhamos um total de sete individuos no momento. Ainda faltavam dois para completar o grupo. Um deles era o dono da casa para a qual nos dirigiamos. Mario Leiro.

O conhecia antes mesmo de participar da mesma sala dos garotos do grupo dos bombeiros na quinta serie. Aquela sala tinha sido formada seis anos atras quando estavamos na quinta. O grupo soh possuia uns tres anos. Fomos responsaveis pela sua criaçao. O engraçado eh que o presidente nao iria participar da viagem. Ele era muito evangelico e jah sabia de nossos abusos com bebida. Um dia quando matavamos aula ele ateh bebeu vinho mas parece que se arrependeu de ter tocado tanto na sua atual namorada no mesmo dia. Todos respeitavamos a sua maneira de ser mesmo que nao concordassemos com essa forma de viver que parecia apenas um masoquismo sem precedentes comparaveis em nossas vidas.

Quando chegamos ao destino, Rio Vermelho, percebemos que a chave nao funcionava. Todos ficaram surpresos e acabamos por descobrir que a porta principal nao era a unica. A construçao ainda precisava de pintura mas jah mostrava como muita dedicaçao havia sido colocada em cada aspecto.

Depois que entramos colocamos os colchoes no chao da sala. Sabonetes e xampus em uma mesa perto do banheiro. Logo pensamos no que iriamos comer. Eu jah tinha muita experiencia lavando pratos e talheres em casa e falei sobre como deveriamos comprar detergente liquido. No mesmo instante começamos a anotar as despesas em um caderno. Resolvemos que iriamos tambem alugar um carro. Eu paguei a maior parte do aluguel como eu era o sujeito mais abastado naquele momento de nossas vidas. O De Leve ficou me devendo mais de cem reais e nunca pagou. Nao que eu me importe com isso. Apenas tenho memoria e depois de varias pequenas dividas aprendi a nao ajudar alguem se eu nao estiver disposto a me desfazer do dinheiro sem nenhuma expectativa de retorno.

A minha primeira grande experiencia com emprestimos foi no colegio militar. Possuia um caderninho e anotava todas as dividas. Quando atingi por volta de vinte nomes resolvi parar. Eram dividas minusculas ateh de centavos mas aquele teste me preparou muito bem para o futuro. Descobri depois que eu era muito mais respeitado por compartilhar balas do que por conceder dinheiro.

O carro foi entregue aonde estavamos localizados. Fomos ateh um supermercado. Compramos comida e produtos de limpeza. Depois fritamos ovos, colocamos em paes e tomamos leite com chocolate. O meu violao havia sido trazido pelo seu Tosta e infelizmente foi roubado quando o deixamos fora da casa por um breve momento. Ele se desculpou e eu respondi que nao importava. Antes do roubo conseguimos tocar algumas musicas no sofa da sala. Tiramos outra foto ali.

Encontramos um cachorro na sacada da casa. Tiramos outras fotos e demos a ele o nome de Brown. Era um animal bonito e acho que sua raça era Beagle. O cara mais descolado do grupo trouxera ervas medicinais. Todas as despesas foram anotadas e divididas no caderno. Nos programamos para a virada do ano na praia aonde o Marcuzinho dançou muito bem. Tambem resolvemos que iriamos para varias danceterias.

Encontramos uma moça que morava no andar de baixo da casa. Ela era bem legal e disse que poderiamos comer tudo o que tinha lah. Nao nos sentimos confortaveis o suficiente. Deixei algum dinheiro no armario da cozinha depois que pegamos alguns biscoitos.

Parece que enquanto estavamos no supermercado um de nos jah estava com tanta fome que resolveu ir ateh uma padaria proximo a casa. Ele tambem chamou uma das meninas que trabalhava lah para conhecer a casa aonde estavam e ela foi. Todos ficamos com muita inveja pois sabiamos que era o que queriamos fazer tambem.

Na virada do ano eu falei que nao queria ir. Eu jah gostava bastante de momentos solitarios. Me vesti com a minha melhor roupa e fiquei na casa observando como ela era bonita. Tambem pensei no que faria durante a viagem. Resolvi que estaria pronto para aventuras.

Um dos rapazes defecou em cima de jornais enquanto o banheiro estava ocupado. Tiramos outra bela foto.
No dia seguinte acho que chegou o senhor Mario Leiro. Ele me convidou para andar pela ilha. Achei uma otima ideia e saimos a peh. Andamos por varias estradas de areia. Conhecemos uma danceteria aonde iriamos depois. Conheci alguns de seus parentes que moravam por ali. Mergulhamos no mar com o que parecia ser um primo seu. Foi bem divertido.

A noite fomos para aquela danceteria. Fui informado que deveria esconder um maço de cigarros nas calças e fiz como o planejado. Um segurança me revistou, pegou o maço, olhou dentro dele e depois me deixou entrar. Eu achei muito estranho e depois percebi que eu era apenas uma isca. Senti alguma vontade de nao entrar para dançar. Depois me falaram de como dividiram os homens e as mulheres para dois lados e entao deixaram todos se misturarem. Nao achei muito interessante.

Quando todos entraram na boate fui caminhar pela cidade. Parei em um ponto de onibus aonde um homem sentou e me pediu um cigarro com um gesto manual. Nao trocamos uma unica palavra, fumamos, e entao me levantei para continuar andando. Passei por um morro no meio da escuridao. Fiquei com medo de ser atropelado mas todos os carros usavam luz alta e eu tentava ficar bem longe da pista. Acabei chegando na estaçao de onibus que ficava perto daquele escritorio turistico mais uma vez. O dia jah amanhecia. Resolvi entrar em um onibus que iria ateh o Rio Vermelho. Parei por lah e consegui encontrar a casa. Lembrei que nao tinha a chave. Encontrei uma entrada pela janela.

Em outro dia fomos para outra danceteria. Tomamos umas caipirinhas antes. Dessa vez resolvi entrar. Haviam varias salas com musicas diferentes mas nao me interessei pela festa. Sai do local e fui ateh uma loja que vendia tempo em computadores conectados a rede mundial. Usei uma webcam pela primeira vez e salvei as fotos no meu correio eletronico.

Outra danceteria. Nessa haviam muitas garotas que falavam espanhol. Resolvi sentar ao lado de uma que se encolhia na parede e tentei falar na lingua dela como a massagem reflexologica era boa para o corpo. Quando comecei a conversa ela falou como todas as outras "no comprendo". Continuei a falar e parece que ela nao se importou. Peguei suas maos e falei o que sabia sobre os beneficios da pressao nos dedos e na palma da mao. Depois me despedi e fui embora quando os amigos me chamaram.

Eles encontraram outras meninas que falavam espanhol. Todos nos encontramos na praia depois. Eu, como sempre, fui caminhar. Encontrei um vendedor de incenso. Parecia que tinha uma vida sofrida mas interessante. Depois da praia fomos comprar artesanato. Quase esqueci que bebemos muita cerveja todos os dias e ateh enquanto estavamos pela praia com nossos oculos escuros. Tiramos varias fotos.

Tambem andei pela praia de nudismo. Estava de sunga e com muita vergonha mas queria perde-la. Apenas caminhei de uma ponta a outra sempre olhando para a frente. Considerei aquilo um grande feito.

Muitas meninas que falavam espanhol terminavam as conversas falando a palavra boludo. Parece que era comum os garotos brasileiros tentarem conversar com elas. Comemos pizza proximo a uma boate alternativa uma vez. Nessa danceteria bebi muito e sorri quando um rapaz passou a mao na minha bunda. Confesso que nao me lembro de ter sorrido nem de ter recebido uma mao na bunda. Talvez tenha sido algum pagamento por ter colocado a minha mao nas nadegas de uma menina em uma festa da quinta serie. Ela queria me dar um tapa quando veio conversar comigo depois no colegio mas resolveu que nao era necessario. Se ela desse o tapa eu nao poderia fazer nada pois sabia que era merecido.

A viagem de volta foi apenas um grande descanso. Um tempo depois viajamos para Caldas Novas com o presidente do grupo e ateh com o senhor Pocotoh.

AnImoL's Life on a Single Page

May the words here assist someone, if not in a good way,
at least to make them know how it is not supposed to be done.

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It was in 1993 when things started to look bad between my parents.
I wanted to die(and this desire was strong inside of me until
I was able to be independent in the physical and also in the
imaterial world after 2013).

Having video games relieved only a small part of my pain.
-----
Having a friend named Mr. Watch. Old home.
Passing from one window to the other.
Playing MSX games.

Losing my father. Crying so much about being given
so much responsability while on fifth grade.
Deciding not to care about anything ever again.

Having two friends. Mayo and JJ.
Deciding to stay with JJ after a verbal fight.
JJ goes to another school while I am on eight grade.
When I enter high school I find Mr. Asian.
Then Bouncer. With him I get to know the holy herb.

It was lunch time. We could leave the military school.
We hanged out around his place. There was more people with us.
His friend warned me not to change how I talked with my parents.
I did not have a father anymore and the woman that was left
only cared about her own interests. But I did not tell them that.
For some strange reason it was the happiest moment in my life.
Right after we started walking back to school...
I felt the need to smile. But I thought that it was kinda silly.
So I just hid my feelings like I always did.

One day I told him that I had a bottle in my living room.
We skipped school some other day to drink.
I just took it. It was like being alive for the first time.
I could tell Bouncer that I was feeling my blood inside of my veins.
I was not sure if he could understand how a child could be
so perceptive.

One day I started to talk to them about the third eye of the mind.
They did not seem to understand a word.

One day we were walking after smoking in a safe place.
I was going to faint. My backpack was so heavy.
All I could do was put my arms over my friends necks.
One to each side.
They sat me down. One of them bought some candy.
I ate it. For some reason it worked.

Bouncer was scared about what could happen to me if
I was to be around after we used the herb.

He did not want to be my friend anymore.
I was feeling lonely again, but this time with hope.
It was possible to be happy in life. It was possible to live.

I started doing some cool stuff. Brought lighters to class.
Some aerosol alcohol-based deodorant spray.
My colleagues loved it. They set trash on fire outside of school.
At night.

I was invited to join the Firefighters club by the President.
He was the President. I felt so honored.
They were all people from my fifth grade classroom.
What luck. We had so much fun together in the years to come.

My uncle was storing dozens of alcohol bottles inside of my
apartment. I say my apartment because my father left it to
me and my two older brothers. He was mom's brother.
The name of the brand was Pincaju.
I started smuggling little bottles to school.
Teacher. But Teacher was not really a teacher. He just acted like a teacher and really enjoyed them bottles.
Around this time I started entering the world wide web.
After connecting to a BBS here and there with a 14kbps modem.
Got some porn. Games. Chatted with the administrator of
Brazuca BBS once.
TBA Internet. One of the older brothers got a login at school.
At the beginning all we did was connect to join IRC channels.
There was a channel for our school. The three of us attended to
the same.
Zeley Mobile was public relations along with Teacher.
Gogo Five and I took care of treasury.
The Vice President was the vice president.

Wooden stick fights near the TV Tower after reading a story
from some norwegian musician and offering the practice to Teacher.

It was very fun to meet before entering school. Before 6 am.
Changing clothes in public bathrooms.
We called the meeting spots batlocals.

One day I just wanted to see how their classes were at
some preparing school for the three year tests that
allowed students to skip the original admission tests
that the University of Brasilia had.
It was some brand new way of entering university.

I talked about those classes at home.
My friends had a big surprise when my name was called
while I was attending to my first class without
ever registering for them. I also did not expect that.

Drinking wine while skipping school on high school's last year.
Dreaming about actually having a girlfriend at the same time.
Soon realising that it was going to be impossible and
deciding to live a solitary life.

Going to Ms. Che Rube's home. Meeting Long Hair and she was a girl. Almost sleeping in the
same room as her once. I was a male so I did not care about
accepting the joke solution of sleeping in her closet then
being kicked out of her home.
They called me strange. I felt so honored to having any label
by someone so beautiful. At least I was noticed.

Getting a high school degree. Deciding to stay in my bedroom
until I found out a way to free myself from the pain
of being alone and desiring a father or a friend
to respect and show my honor to.

My high school friends where studying at some place called bIlal.

Having the first kiss. Remembering myself about it everyday.
About how warm her tongue was inside of my mouth.
And how I enjoyed feeling hers with my own.

Teacher was around. He was a veteran already.
Not anything like the boy that cried to drag Frenchie the Girl's attention
below a building while we skipped classes that were supposed
to prepare us for the three year tests that would
allow entrance to the University of Brasilia.

Writing a letter of about thirty lines to the girl.
Saving a copy for myself to never forget about that moment.
Delivering it on my bike to the guy that took care of
her building's entrance.

Reading some books to try to overcome her lack of interest.
Watching a guy with bleached hair having so much success
with an extremely beautiful girl because he was a musician.
Asking for an electric guitar. Starting to play it.

Meeting Ninja. A guy that represented a lot
of what I wanted to be in the future. He had ten years more
than I did. Ten years have passed since we first met.

----
A trip to Florianopolis with high school friends.
They were already studying Economics in the University of Brasilia.
Zeley Mobile was studying to be a veterinarian.
-----

Second kiss. It was not that important anymore.
I have traveled to Itajai to meet Ms. Saints. She had blue eyes,
I think. She was quite beautiful. I enjoyed a lot
talking to her. After coming back home and calling her fat
she just said that I died to her. It was fine.
It was not going to work out.

It was my first trip alone. The guy that sat next to me was
from Rio. A very interesting man.

The bus was not going to enter the city.
I was in complete darkness. Saw some lights in the horizon.
Ran towards them. Hit some concrete block in the middle of the road.
I fell. But I had some ninja senses and did not get hurt.
Used a public payphone. Called Ms. Saints. I told her that I was going
to find the hotel where my reservation was made.
The guy inside of the hotel did not want to allow me inside.

I walked around the city. Found some taxis.
Hit his window. He woke up.
Told him that I wanted a cheap place to stay at.
He did a good job.

While inside of this hotel I wrote so many things
that I felt like discovering the secret to turn any metal
into gold.

I went to some lan house and played a first person shooter.
Ms. Saints showed me something that looked like a professional
music training session. It was quite interesting.

I then called the same taxi driver.
Mr. Pole was very kind and did a great job.

On my way back the neighbor inside of the bus was some sort of hippie.
He talked about how Brasil had cheap old technology.
About his third level degree. It was about physical fitness.

Before going to Itajai Ms. Saints was very jealous of Fields.
She kissed Teacher first. Then me. She had more experience
than both of us. She spoke french and lived in Sao Paulo
before coming to Brasilia.
I invited Fields to run at the Water Eyes Park.
She was curious to see how I progressed.
She was not impressed.

A trip to Pirenopolis. There I forgot where we were staying at.
I sat on some stone staircase. A girl sat beside me.
No words were spoken. It was a cool moment.
She then left.

I tried to call Vice President's father from a public payphone.
He gave me some information.
But I was too shy to tell him that I was lost.

Morning came.
I then decided to attend to a church meeting. Evangelic church.
It was sunday. I was the only guy inside.
The preacher showed up. Made his speech. It was interesting.

I had money to get back home. So I asked someone
about the nearest bus stop.
My friends gave me my backpack after we met in Brasilia once again.

Meeting CG in some spaceships game online.
She was a natural blonde.
She wanted to sell her electric guitar in order to pay
for my trip to her city. I knew that it was not worth it.
So I said no.

Long Hair later left a comment on my blog. Maybe she did not
forgive herself for leaving it. "of killing".
She was in London.
It was after my text that said "Happy Happy Joy Joy"
with a picture of a first person shooter game.
Two words were the only thing necessary for me to never
forget about her.
She was one of the most beautiful girls even on high school
when she still had some extra weight. I also did.

After some messages exchanged via email she knew that I was
very curious about her trip to Europe.

Mr. Angst invited me to some car trips around the city.
It was pretty fun. My old friends from the Firefighter's club
had decided to abandon me.
One day Ms. Zeni from school invited me to her birthday party.
There I met Mr. Asian again. And Mr. Bluemagician. His father
killed his mother with a gun then killed himself while we
were on high school. He took everything like a grown man.
Then he took a plane to Australia.
At that same party I met Ms. Axe. She was pretty cute.
Ms. Zeni knew that I was interested in her and arranged some
meetings.

One day Ms. Zeni needed a place to house her friend from
Sao Paulo. Chainbreaker was a niilist. He slept here for some days
and gave me a great book about atheism. I have learned so much
from this book that mom just took it someday and pretended that
it never existed.

It was like finally having the strongest chain that kept
my own thoughts from appearing inside of my brain, broken.
I knew that it was related to the friend that
was ten years older than me. People did not like him.
But I knew that he had skills that I would never stop
trying to mimic.

A trip to the northeast.
I took the wheel a lot of times. Had my license.

Three great months of fun.
There I met family members and Albino Girl.
It seemed that she was the whitest girl in town.
Almost albino. After having some protected fun inside of
mom's car I invited her to my place a couple of times
but she did not want to come. So I decided to end
our relationship by phone.

Had good times with my cousin Frog Killer. Also with Joseph.
Great people.
There I let Frog Killer drive. Joseph park the car.
I knew what I was doing.
Some old guy died while I was there.
He never wanted to talk to me, so I could not care less about him.
Maybe he could not talk. He was very scared.
If it is possible to save him somehow after his death...
May the Subspacian religion assist him into achieving
eternal life in the best possible way.

Drank a lot of water filled with mosquitoes eggs.
Maybe I experienced dengue.

Had my first bathtub bath.
My room had an air conditioner.

Coming back to Brasilia. Meeting Frenchie. This time she asked for
unprotected sex. I was very honored but had to say
"I am not doing this for you or myself, I am doing this to both
of us."(so we dont get any disease, and... early children) and used the condom.

Meeting Yellow Girl online. She just sent me a message out of nowhere
in an old social networking site.
She was a natural blonde.
We decided to meet at a bar. A funny guy asked me for money
while I was walking near a parking lot.
I gave him two brazilian reals. He just said
"but this is a bill!". That was a cool individual.

I was drinking some white wine when Yellow Girl showed up.
She was more beautiful than in the photos.
We talked about so many things.
Then I took her hand and did a massage.
There was no turning back.

We walked down the street until we found a bench.
It was a great kiss. We did that many times.

She was living in an apartment near her job. She was a secretary.
There was another girl living with her. She worked with mom.
What a surprise. This girl also told mom about my behaviour.
How I talked about inserting the cane into a woman,
right after her words about some gospel music.
It was so damn funny. But that led to the end of my relationship
with Yellow Girl.

There were also two brothers living in the same apartment.
The four of them were from the same city. Little Brasilia.
What a nice name for a city. I had never heard of it before.
Yellow Girl invited me to build a church along with some Bapthists
from the United States. I felt so honored.

She showed me to her aunt first. This aunt was a hairdresser.
I was accepted.

The southern americans were nice people. Always talking about God.
One of them was in Europe during World War II. How interesting.
After translating that a guy working on a bench did not have time
to care about his toe wound I told them that brazilians were
lazy people. The girl just said that it was cultural and I
agreed.

Father Ninja Turtle gave me a nice speech about how you must trust God
without having any physics knowledge and sitting on a chair
knowing that it would support the weight. It was inspiring.

But it may also be the fact that when you do not have any
body balance skill your brain adjusts itself to receive some
unknown signal and move your muscles in a way that will not
make anything break.

Yellow Girl's mother was black! What a surprise.

I invited one of the brothers living in that apartment to
practice some skating. It was fun.
I also tried to teach Yellow Girl how to drive a car inside of
the military school's parking lot. She did well.

One day Yellow Girl's friend came to Brasilia. She was an actress.
I dragged her to the University of Brasilia, where
my old friends studied. But they were already avoiding me.
It was cool anyway. We also watched a movie about love
in one of the two brother's friend apartment.
He was an english teacher.

Meeting Ms. Zeni and Axe. I told Long Hair to show up at the same day.
I just wanted to see how things were going to work out.
Chainbreaker was also present. I have never talked so much
around other people before.
Ms. Zeni slaps me on the face in front of everyone.
I guess that I was mocking her lack of courage too much.
It was fun. She later became a zen girl.
Chainbreaker and Ms. Zeni vanished.
I bought a rose for Axe and told her that men were like dogs.
She got the message.
Long Hair showed up trying to dance on an arcade machine.
Her perfume was stronger than a mermaid's voice, but I
was ready for it.
We went to a karaoke bar by Long Hair's suggestion.
Hideout was the name.
She showed some of her vocal skills.
I had none but tried to impress everyone singing a song
that I have never heard before and creating new
sound patterns, my guess, above the lyrics.
Axe was trying to have fun. She was a beginner.
Then I was sure that she did not want to see me anymore.
Neither did Long Hair. I have the skill of pretending to be
much more than what I actually am before a real meeting.

I was learning to drink. The trip to the northeast was
not one hundred percent great. Mom was cheating on her
current boyfriend. Her lover was in our car when we
traveled there. Her boyfriend asked me about this
and I thought that the right thing to do was
to tell him the truth. Even though I hated the man I would
not enjoy being in such a situation.

Her lover worked in the government's health section.
He gave her lots of strong drugs.
She put them into my food.
I was drinking so much at the time.
Visited my friends at Vice President's home.
Things were a little out of control.

I was a little desperate.
I paid a visit to my father at his workplace.
I do not think that he had any idea of what was going on
or how to assist me at it.
I sent him an email after I found some papers about mom's
vengeance. I was so drugged that it was impossible to
know what they meant. But I knew it was something bad.

It was useless to try to fight. All I could do was wait
for the worse.

The middle brother showed how much he hated me.
So did mom and her lover.
They tried to put me away for good.
It was obvious that nothing was wrong with me.
In two weeks I was out of that druggie's house.

I am sure that my friends got some calls from mom.
None of them told me anything.

I was left alone in my bedroom. Trying to reach some sort of
transcendence. A way to have a good memory.
A way to never let my guard down again.

I was forced to get my third level degree.
The name of the course was Digital Gaming.
Nothing was worth listening to or reading.
Two teachers were quite good.
An asian dude and a guy that knew a lot about networking.

I have lost around six years of my life in that prison.
I do not know who paid for it.
I was first place in the admission tests.
I was able to avoid getting the actual diploma.

I was also forced to work.
The pay was two hundred brazilian reals a month.
At least I was allowed to keep that money.
The owner of the computer store had a debt with mom.
She assisted him when he needed someone to back him up
while he was buying or renting some real state.

I was able to create an Extracorporeal Manual.

Then I worked at some meat store.
We had to prepare the books to deliver them on bus stops, for free.
I was paid around ten brazilian reals a day.
It was quite interesting.

I had a great idea of renting a room inside of my apartment.
The middle brother wanted one hundred percent of the money obtained.
I basically told him to go fuck himself.
He was already so rich that it was a clear bully move.

A friend from high school found me by accident on a game and we had
a nice meeting. Brazil's President was on television that day.
Mr. Hairs. He was at Mr. Angst's place at the moment.
Mr. Angst said that he wanted to eat something and left.
I guess that it was because he owed me twenty brazilian reals.

The only friend from high school to ever try to contact me shows up
on another social network. He wanted to convert me to his church.
It was fun. I even took a bus with him to a place where whoever
slept was going to wake up chained to Jesus. I was not able to
rest that night. On the second day some preacher was babbling
so much nonsense that I had to talk back to him.
Some people knew what I was talking about. I was just showing
everyone that his words were false.
Then I got up from my chair and left.
I hope that Mr. Pimbola did not have a big deception.

I did visit that church again to give them some money.
The Subspacian religion was created and that church gave us
the initial protection and information that I needed to
make my own.
I showed the piece of paper to Mr. Pimbola.
I am sure that he did not understand half of it.

One day he invited his cousin to come to the church with us.
He rode motorcycles until an accident made he lose all
movement on his right arm.
This was a sign. I knew I had to give that church some money.
Ten percent of my earnings that year went to them.

On december of the same year my older brother shows up in our
apartment. He tells me that he wants to take me to a mental
institution. I was totally cornered.
His wife, our cousin, is quite evil as well.
I pretend to accept my fate.
I walk into my room. Lock my door. I knew that it was impossible
to lose my only possession in the whole world. My home.
I try to stay silent. He starts knocking at the door.
I kick it with all my strength. It stops him for a couple of seconds.
He starts knocking again. It was the last information I needed to
know that it was the end. I open the window with the most force
that I have ever applied to it in my life.
I put my right foot on the wall. I mentally ask the only
individual that I had any trust on if I really have to do it.
Yes seems to be the right answer. I jump.

After my body had no more connection with the building everything
went black. No sounds. No feelings. No pain. Everything was gone.
Maybe I was going to rest. Maybe I was not going to have to
avoid talking to my older brothers and listen to evil words anymore.
Maybe my mother was not going to be able to terrorize me ever again.

I wake up in an ambulance. I can still breathe. I can still blink.
I keep blinking twice like in my Extracorporeal Manual.
I have always promised myself that if I was ever to lose any movement
in my body, I would rather die. For some reason that thought
did not even cross my mind. I was just feeling the sensations
that I had when I was watching the presentation of the game
that Mr. Epic gifted me a couple of days before.

I sleep again. I wake up on some hospital bed.
I can move my body. All I can think about is some zombie
infestation program that I made sometime before this happened.
I try to untie my arms from the bed. I free my right arm.
Some nurse comes by and ties it up one more time.

I am transferred to another place. After the bed starts moving
I black out.

I sleep for so many days. My breathing is messed up.
It does not matter. I can only think about fleeing from all
the terror. Even inside of my brain they show up.
I never feel any pain.

Mom finally shows up. It's a private hospital this time.
Maybe she mentally accepted to leave me alone.
Lots of nurses. Doctors. Everyday. Exams.
One of them catches my attention. He calls me by my name and surname.
He has tattoos on his arms. I can feel that he is a nice guy.

He brings me a picture of a great guitarrist.
This man knows what he is doing.

My uncle visits me with my female cousin. I remember mentally
talking to them before the inevitable accident.
I can not tell them about it. They show their respect and leave.

The older brothers have the courage to show up.
They do not talk about their plan.
It is obvious that they want to sell the apartment.
I still do not get what makes people with so much still want more.

A situation that I have also seen before the accident shows up.
A distant relative takes me for a walk on the sun.
This psychologist is from my family. She is a good girl.

A doctor shows up after I mentally agree with giving him a lot
of money someday.
I try to talk to him in symbols.
The game of the eleven. I mean eleven thousand brazilian reals.
He seems to agree. He shows me his son the day after.
He saves my right arm.

I stay at mom's boyfriend's place for a year. The same guy
that was cheated on.
They decide to give me a chance to go back to my apartment.

The middle brother has the courage to show up, once.
Maybe he just wanted a good laugh.

Creating my own religion. The point is not to make people
interested in it. It is about teaching people to
take care of themselves. While inside of both worlds.

Subspacianism(random)

Instead of what you may think, the religion and philosophy school that Subspacianism refers to is not exactly the game that was made by Virgin Interactive. It is more about subspace channels. Something so fast that makes you able to reach any point in existence at any moment.

It is not that fun to reach a dead planet but finding something that you have created yourself can be a great experience. Like when I thought about having a whole planet filled with humans that enjoyed playing the electric guitar. Or when I imagined having millions of dimensions that were almost like this one, but in each one of them my life took a different path.

Getting to the actual point, it is possible to reach any other living being on the planet at any moment. This is quite exciting as women are almost always willing to think about sexual pleasure if you treat them well. The beginning is not easy but with time your skill improves like any subject that you put enough effort into. The bad part is that no one will ever admit that this is true. So it may all be just your mind playing tricks. Or some sort of chain that still blocks the full control of your own brain. What can be proved is the desire to reproduce that every living being has. When a male reaches a female, even without any physical contact, some sort of link is made. The sexual link is the one with more probability of being proven. While it is not lets have our conscience improved before laws and guard jobs are created to stop people from getting knowledge and pleasure without money.